Thou shall wonder

It is 4 a.m. and I have been up for 3 hours.  During this wonderful bout of pregnancy insomnia the baby has had the hiccups, done what feels like some serious dancing in my belly and I have had a handful of contractions.  I am 34 weeks pregnant and I have had pretty good luck with sleep, save for a handful of nights like this one.  So while I toss and turn, after I have read a book, and had a snack and let the dog out, my mind wanders to this baby as he or she wiggles around and gets comfortable.  Not knowing the gender is making these last weeks really fun.  We keep referring to him or her as something different all the time. Everyone has an opinion, and is so certain their guess is right.  I sit and wonder, will it be another little boy, who looks just like the two other boys I live with? Will it be a little red headed girl? Maybe she will have my hair, and Jeff's eyes.  Maybe he will be a great sleeper like Luke was.  When will I get to meet this little person I have already spent so much time with? How will I fit more toys in this house that is already full of pirate ships?

Luke is really excited about being a big brother.  He talks about the baby all the time.  He asks questions about what it will be like with the baby around.  I assure him that he still will be able to watch cartoons with me in my bed when the baby is here.  He also has taken a new interest in baby toys, most of which were his, but he did not care about before. He is taking on some chores, like clearing the table and collecting the garbage and he is learning to buckle himself in his car seat. He is such a sweet and loving child.  I know the new addition will be an adjustment for him, but if his behavior around other babies is any indication, my biggest concern will be keeping him from smothering the baby with affection.

Being awake all night also makes me think of how I got here.  How am I 30 and about to have my second kid?  How have I been married for 7 years to a wonderful man and I am able to work in a field that I enjoy?  Maybe it is the baby coming that makes everything seem better.  Maybe I am delirious because I have been up for so long and in a few hours my son will be up and our morning routine will start and I will work a full day on little sleep.  Whatever the reason, it doesn't matter. My excitement grows daily as we prepare for our impending surprise baby. I can't wait to meet this tiny person I love so much already.

Thou shall listen

  Three is such a fun age.  Thanks to my speech pathologist BFF, Luke has an amazing vocabulary. He talks ALL the time, we were in the car for a half hour yesterday and he chattered on the entire ride. His chatting continued throughout his cousins entire dance recital, which I am sure the people in front of us loved. My favorite part of his vocabulary is the normal childhood errors.  I love that he pronounces animal "aminal".  I told him something the other day and he looked right at me and said "I already knowed that". He is absolutely hysterical.  Yesterday, I was talking to him and his cousins about getting along, and he raised his hand for me to call on him for his turn to speak (the first time he has ever done that), and when I did he said "What does clouds mean?". He started talking to the baby in my belly too. In addition to all his chatting, he likes to sing.  He makes up songs all the time, he also likes to sing Mickey Mouse songs. He has the sweetest voice too. He is without a doubt my little noisemaker.

   He was cranky yesterday so I had him take a nap, I laid with him for a little bit and he wouldn't stop talking to me, around the seventh time I told him to be quiet, he said it was "Teddy talking"  His teddy bear was apparently the one talking, and he needed to be separated from the other stuffed animals. So, Teddy was placed in my room so he wouldn't distract Luke, or the other animals from their nap.  Luke turns 4 in a few weeks, while I am sure 4 will be as fun and funny as 3, I wish I could remember all of  the funny things he says and does on a daily basis. 

Thou Shall have Another

Jeff and I are expecting baby #2 this fall.  Due October 2nd, although I expect a September appearance. We are very blessed and excited.  Some kids don't react well to the news of a sibling, but not my Lucas.  After I found out I was pregnant, but before we told Luke he whined to me that two of his friends "get a baby and I have nothing" with a pout and crossed his arms.  I love the timing of this conversation. I consoled him and about a month later we showed him the ultrasound.  He was instantly excited and declared we should name the baby "Captain Hook".

Now in my fifth month of pregnancy I feel my little invader dancing around all the time, Jeff was able to feel it once so far as well. Its amazing to feel, often when I am having a tough time at work or stressing out about something simple I feel a little nudge and I am reminded what is really important. It reminds me of my pregnancy with Luke, which was very similar and pretty normal - according to the books. Through the journey of deciding when to start trying to have another baby I learned the important lesson that there is never a perfect time, we went back and forth about timing, due to my job change and our financial goals and eventually we decided the conditions were never going to be perfect, but we wanted a bigger family. You would think we remembered this lesson from the first time, but I guess we are slow learners. As it turns out the timing is wonderful, because such a blessing is wonderful regardless of the delivery date.  Luke will be going into 4 year preschool and can't wait to have a baby around.

I have noticed slight changes in Luke since he found out about the baby.  They may be completely unrelated to the news, but he is clinging to stuffed animals which is a new behavior for him.  Luke has a puppy, a "batman kitty" and a teddy bear that he rotates having by his side. He also told me that he would only like a baby brother, because the only girls he likes are his cousins.  He comes up with other hysterical anecdotes almost daily.  I am so excited to see him as a big brother.

Thou Shall Count Your Blessings

I got a new niece this week. She is perfect.  I have 5 nieces and 3 nephews and it still amazes me how much I can love them all so much as soon as I meet them. Luke is over the moon for baby Madelynn. I didn't get to spend much time with her yet but I am assured she is a regular newborn who sleeps, eats, and poops all day.  I have a cold that came about as I was leaving work on Friday, effectively keeping me in my pajamas all weekend, save for the Saturday morning trip to the doctor to find out Luke has strep throat again.  While it would be easy to be dramatic about being too sick to spend any time with the new bundle of joy on my days off, I still feel blessed.  After the second dose of his medicine, Luke exclaimed "I'm not sick anymore!" Although he is still sick, he is feeling better. After his declaration he then stated his favorite form of celebration, "Parade!" It always makes me smile. He is also in major repeat mode. My favorite example of this from this weekend was when Jeff asked me how I felt yesterday and when I responded "I feel terrible" Luke said without hesitation "I feel terrible too!" He said this with a smile on his face and then asked me to tickle him.

I did get to see Madelynn during the week, and hopefully will get to snuggle with her more this coming week. Welcoming her into our family  I am reminded how wonderful it is to be an aunt.  This blog is full of my thoughts on motherhood, but being the fun aunt is pretty awesome.  I hosted my sister's 2 older daughters for a sleepover on Friday, to attempt to allow some more sleep for my sister.  During the sleepover - which consisted of taking the kids to dinner and being the loudest and messiest table at our favorite Mexican restaurant and watching Chipwrecked on an air mattress in the living room - Monica proclaimed me to be better than her mom because I let them stay up late and watch movies.  While I realize these are not wonderful qualities in a mom - they are awesome qualities in an aunt. We danced around the house and ate snacks and had a pretty fun Friday night.

I am also blessed with a wonderful friend who is having playdate with Luke while I am sick in bed and my husband is at the Jaguar game. I'm sure he will come home smarter than he left. And my wonderful mom will be over to bring me some chicken noodle soup soon.

With all these wonderful people I am reminded of one of my favorite Dave Matthews quotes "Turns out not where, but who you're with that really matters"

Thou Shall Repeat Yourself

Being a mom has turned me into a liar. I don't know how many times I've said "I'm not going to tell you again" only to repeat the direction at least one more time. I finally realized I should just ask Luke "Please don't make me ask again."

I know Lucas can hear just fine.  Sometimes he likes to pretend that he can't.  I said his name 7 times today without him paying one bit of attention to me.  He expected me to tell him not to go where he was headed and decided to ignore me.  He did the same thing when I asked him to go get his sneakers.  You would think that putting your shoes on was the hardest thing you could do, I had to asked several times, and eventually I went to get his sneakers and put them on him.

While he completely ignores me, he requires my undivided attention when he has something to say.  He does not care if I am talking to someone, or doing something, he will repeat "Mommy" and if he can reach my face he will turn it facing him, if not he will grab whatever part of me he can reach hold on until I turn to him.  What he doesn't realize is that he always has at least a part of my attention.

I'm sure I will be repeating myself for a long time to come.  "Don't jump on the couch", "Don't climb on the dog" are as much a part of our routine as "it's time to brush your teeth" and "you have to eat your vegetables if you want a popsicle".  My favorite phrase to repeat is one my mom taught me, "I love you from the bottom of the ocean to the top of the sky"  I say that to Luke daily and he says it back to me now, but usually gets it a little jumbled. My hope that I will repeat "I love you" more than I end up repeating "no hitting."

Thou shall take it all in stride

My precious baby boy looked at me this week and said "Mommy, you mean."  I can't quite express how that made me feel except to say I was slightly devastated.  First, telling a toddler not to play around the toilet is not mean, second where did he learn to call people "mean", and third, why am I justifying to myself that I am not mean? I was definitely a little sad about him calling me "mean" until I told the dog to get off the couch and he repeated me instantly.

He has also learned how to perfectly imitate my most irritated-and-about-to-lose-my-temper voice. Hearing my words and tone come from him is a little shocking.  He has said "Don't talk to me like that" and "You don't tell me what to do" and it sounds just like me. The most fun part of all of this is that my dad recently expressed concern that Luke has a hearing problem.  His hearing has been checked and it is fine, he has a common condition in males - selective hearing.  Luke will admit that he heard you and chose not to listen, and when he does, I swear, he is trying to roll his eyes. I feel like he should come with a disclaimer "what you say can and will be held against you, most likely in an embarrassing situation." Consider yourself warned, he remembers everything.

He is also starting to show a preference for my husband.  This is mostly at bedtime and bath time, and Jeff loves it.  I have to remind myself Luke is just a toddler and wanting Daddy to read bedtime stories is not an insult to Mommy.  I also have to remember not to rub it in when Luke wants to snuggle with me and not Jeff.

When Luke is really tired it is almost like he has been replaced with an evil impostor child, and when he's happy his smile and laugh can light up a room.  I'm learning to not get so frustrated by the rough times, and not to be sensitive when he wants his daddy.  Not getting so stressed out is also helping me to enjoy the fun times even more.

Thou Shall Giggle

Kids are funny. Sometimes intentionally and sometimes by accident.  Luke had a sleepover last night with my two nieces and we had so much fun.  Monica had been asking for weeks to have a sleepover and we finally got it together.  The 3 kids had a blast. In true sleepover form they all slept on the bean bag bed in the living room and went to bed late and woke up early.  They also were in great moods almost the whole time.

Since Monica was born you had to earn her smiles and giggles and in her 5 years I think last night was the most I have heard her laugh. Lucas was trying to get her to laugh and saying silly phrases.  Monica would look at me and say "What is he talking about?" like we were the adults in the room, then give a real belly laugh when Lucas thought she was funny for questioning him. In the middle of their laughter Monica would say "He is cracking me up!"

Marlee and Lucas have always given their smiles and giggles easier. I think Marlee already knows how irresistible her smile is; I wonder how many sticky situations it is going to help her charm her way through. Luke is very animated and dramatic, so when he is happy he is smiling and laughing and it is contagious.

I wish I could tape the three of them laughing with each other, I doubt anyone could hear it and not join in.   We watched The Lion King and sang the songs and snuggled and had tons of snacks. It was truly fun, even for me. I giggled along with them like a little girl.